Having hopped on a train to London in search of fame, fortune, and more cultural stimulation than Essex could provide, beautiful but naïve Jim finds himself jobless, penniless and renting a cardboard box from a homeless man.
Down on his luck, but still smiling, Jim catches the eyes of The Raconteurs, a unique troupe of high-class male escorts who specialise in cultural, post-coital conversation. Jim’s got the looks, he’s got the charm, but to reach his true potential with high-class clientele the Raconteurs have to teach him absolutely everything about art. There’s just one problem; when Jim sees a masterpiece – a real masterpiece – he is overwhelmed, he becomes one with the art, he faints.
Undeterred, Jim takes the neon drenched streets of Soho by storm, attaining the ultimate in objectification – he becomes a muse. Meanwhile, Paul, a mysterious figure from the Raconteurs’ past, spot’s potential in Jim’s art affliction – Jim’s ability to immediately determine genuine art from fake is a precious commodity just waiting to be exploited.